Women Who Burn Water and Men with Soft Hands

On facebook today, a friend posted this comment:

“A WOMAN AT MY JOB TOLD ME THAT IF YOU ARE OVER 25 AND CAN'T COOK A FULL COURSE MEAL THAN YOUR NOT A REAL WOMAN... LADIES HOW DO U FEEL ABOUT THIS??? AND MEN DO U CONCEDE TO MY CO-WORKER'S COMMENTS???”

Forty-five comments later (yes, 45!) I was overwhelmed by the responses by both men and woman. Is this how we measure our woman and ourselves?

News flash: The roles in society have changed. Once we all decided that the American Dream required 2 incomes to achieve, traditional gender roles flew out the window.

Marriage is a moving target. There isn’t a “one size fits all” definition anymore. I hear far more stories of women who rely on their husbands so much that after a divorce they can’t even balance their checkbooks. For those women, THAT concerns me far more than if she can whip up butternut squash soup and a pot roast.

And if you are not the bread winner, and your wife/girlfriend brings home the bacon rockin the board room, you better move your butt into that kitchen and fry her up some chicken. And at bonus time, you better call your grandma and get that special mac and cheese recipe. She’s earned it.

But more than anything, I’m done with the rampant discussion about what makes a real woman with little to no conversation around what makes a real man.

Exhibit A: I asked a guy recently to change a light bulb for me, and you would have thought I asked him to build the Great Wall of China. By hand. Alone. In a snow storm. Naked. He whined and moaned and in the end, he didn’t do it!

For some reason, the evolving positions in society make people feel 100% comfortable judging women for how they fall short of their “wife/womanly/ motherly roles” But men go unchecked.

Well…I’m going to say it. Men - being in the office has made some of you physically lazy, spoiled, and just plan soft. An hour on the elliptical machine is NOT the equivalent of fixing the dishwasher. Racquetball and golf are NOT equal to cleaning out the gutters. Some of you have outsourced your “manly” duties to illegal immigrants looking for work in the parking lot of the Home Depot. And no one has checked you on it until now.

So on both sides, let’s be honest about what is important and what is not. Would everyone love to have a well prepared meal waiting when they get home? Yes. (Shoot, me included) But for all of the single mothers I know, its more impressive to me that they can put food on the table at all…no matter how its prepared.

Would I love to have a man making six figures so I can stay home and watch “As the World Turns?” Hells yeah! But I would rather have a man who isn’t afraid to do what ever it takes to care for his family; be that a blue collar, white collar, green collar, or dirty collar job.

Let’s stop measuring ourselves by outdated criteria and give credit for all that make us truly great woman, men, and partners. We need to focus on being good to each other and stop trying to fit each other into these little tiny archaic boxes.

Any ladies (or guys) interested…I’m happy to offer cooking classes for my gumbo. It’s amazing. Or you can just pay me to make it for you. I’m a renaissance business woman.