Thanks Belle

Over the last week, I’ve been devouring back posts from A Belle in Brooklyn (http://www.abelleinbrooklyn.com/).  Several people have told me I would enjoy her work and they were right.  She is a Maryland girl (from just outside of DC) living in New York and I’m a Jersey Girl (who stopped over in New York) living in DC.   Why wouldn’t I enjoy her work given the braiding of our paths?

She lays it all out on the page in a way that is admirable.  Her newer posts are good, a mix of efforts through her various major media blogging gigs and follow up after her recently published book.  But I’m more enjoying the older stuff.  From where when she was hungry and young working to figure out what love, life and the pursute of happiness meant to her.  When she’s mad, she says so, when she has a bad break up, she tells it. 

She writes something everyday; even if it’s to tell her readers she’s working too hard, or too upset from recent events to write.  It’s gritty and raw and pulls you in like the daytime soaps.  She changes the names to protect the sometimes not so innocent but tells her own stories completely naked. No spin to make herself seem more put together or flashier than she is.

Sometimes, when you can’t find the right words to express your state of mind, reading someone else’s works just as well.  It takes some courage to admit you don’t have it all figured out and even more to really stop trying and be at peace right were you are.  That Belle; she’s got me excited to throw a party right here – right were I am.  I can’t even see perfect from where I’m standing and I’m starting to kinda like it.

All yours - BCG

East of the West Wing

It’s one of those nights - I’m enjoying disk 29 of my prized complete series of The West Wing.  When I want to be inspired I look to Josh, Toby, Donna, and CJ.  Beautifully flawed yet well intended; they follow their passions even off a cliff.  I am far less noble, but I’m them. My heart leads my actions: good, bad, or otherwise.  And it works, somehow for them, and for me.

I realized in this episode, that I’m Donna.  She’s reading profiles of people eligible for pardons, and she can’t cull down the list because she’s gotten invested in all of their stories.  I too have never learned, in work or play, how to keep life at arms length.  I lead with my heart in…well everything really.  I’m an all-in girl (I think its part of my charm but I might be fooling myself). 

I can appreciate those people who are cool, calm, and collected.  I don’t understand them at all.  I erupt when I’m angry or hurt and throw everything I have behind something or someone I believe in.  When I love something, there is no question.  When I don’t, there is no doubt.  It might be why I love this show so much.  A full cast of people with no capacity to exist without passion.

“You want to impress me? Do something. Talk is cheap.”

A man just yelled that at Toby and stormed away.  That was the line I was looking for: the theme to sum up my day.  A day that was filled with words and meaningless gestures.  I realized that is what I wanted to say.  Wanted to scream, because that’s what we passionates do, we raise our voices when we feel something. 

“Do something!!”

Talk is cheap and I had been talking and listening all day.  Talking and listening for days actually.  Having circular conversations with people chasing their tails.  Spinning in comfortable circles working to convince me that spinning makes sense.  Nothing infuriates me more than being around people who have the capacity to run and do great things – who instead stand there and spin.  I get dizzy very quickly.  And frustrated with the waste of potential even quicker.  I mean, what would Josh do?  He would take action, move ahead, do something that made the world better.  Or at least try to.  He would piss off a lot of people along the way, but the end would justify the means. A step ahead is a step ahead.  It’s infinitely better than spinning in a circle.

“Talk is cheap.”

I don’t really have any answers on this one. You can lead a horse to water but not make them admit they are thirsty.  But at least Donna and the gang made me feel right at home.  I turned off the cell and the blackberry, took a few Advil and drank some sake.  Yeah, I know; dinner of champions.  Don’t worry; I had a slice of my favorite Naked Pizza too.  A girl has to be balanced with all this spinning going on around her.  Maybe tomorrow I can get some of the spinning to stop.

Donna got all but one of the people pardoned. A little passion can go a long way.

Your BC “Donna at heart” Girl